Potty Talk and Cranky Old Men

Saturday was the train show.  Not the really big one, but just the big one.  Anyway, I was hoping beyond hope that Dave would take the kiddies and leave me home alone in bliss, since I really could care less to see a bunch of trains in boxes.  But that didn't happen.  So off we go with two kids (who, by the way, were beginning to come down with something nasty and were really cranky) as one big happy family to the convention center. 

At first, all was blissful.  Everyone was enjoying themselves.  After about an hour, Stink fell asleep in the stroller.  Ah, I thought as I settled in to watching the teeny tiny trains wrap around a replica of Mount Everest. 

"I'm tired.  I don't want to walk anymore." I heard from behind me.
"I'm sorry, Chach, but Stink is sleeping in the stroller right now." I told her in my best 'I am so a happy Mommy' voice. 
"But I want to lay down." she whined.
"How about some candy?  Can you walk for candy?" I asked her.
"Yes!" she sang.

Maybe 15 minutes and a 1/4 pound of Swedish Fish later.....

"I am still tired!" she whined again only this time louder since I guess the sugar rush was kicking in.

As I turned around to possibly bribe her with something else I noticed she was about half way in the stroller. 

"Wah!  Wah!" Stink screams.
"Scooch over!" she cried back. 
"Wah!  Wah!" he continued to scream. 

And that, my friends, is when all hell broke loose.  Two kids crying.  Both trying to cram their little bodies into a single stroller vying for space.  And a husband, who insisted we all go to some stupid (yes, I am calling it stupid now) train show as a family, is missing in action. 

Finally, I catch him out the corner of my eye and give him the look that says, "You!  Let's go!  Now!" 

BUT, it doesn't end there because 'someone' didn't get what he needed at the show and we now have to stop at a store close to home, which we could have just done from the start and saved a good three hours and few hundred nerve cells. 

Once again, unload two cranky kids from the car and enter the store.  As we walk in, I notice the two older gentleman behind the counter beaming me with dirty looks.  Great, I think to myself.  This should be really fun.  

"Yes, I need track and switches." Dave said to them.
"Right this way sir." the older of the two replied as he led him towards the back of the store. 

We followed.  Well, actually I followed while struggling with a toddler who thinks the $1500. train engine looks like a pretty cool toy to toss and a still very whinny girl. 

"Daddy?" Chachi interrupts as the store employee is talking, "I have to go potty."
"Can you hold it honey?" I say hoping that its just a ploy to see what the bathroom looks like, as we encounter that often.
"No.  I feel like I am going to poop my pants." she informs us.

The elderly man chuckles.

"Mr.?  Can my kid use your restroom?" Dave asks him.
"Sorry.  Out of order." he says.

"Mommy!  I really need to POOP!" Chachi says again and she begins to dance around as customers walk by us trying to cover their giggles.

I notice Dave's face turning red.  The vein pops out of his neck.  I can see him clenching and unclenching his fists.

"Your kidding me, right?" Dave retorts, "You mean to tell me you have 10 employees standing around here and no bathroom." 
"Yup.  Out of order."  the man returns. 
"This is ridiculous.  You think I am going to give you my business after you refuse to let my kid use the restroom.  What, is their 14 karat gold toilet paper in there or something."

I grab Chachi's hand and run down three stores to the sandwich shop.  They quickly usher us towards the bathroom as I am sure they could see the look of an explosion about to happen. 

She poops.  All is well on that end. 

Needless to say, we did not get the track for the trains.  Or the switches.  The end.   

Comments

[debbie]

What a day. Good for you all for walking out without anything. Like I believe that bathroom was broken!